Day in, day out Indonesia tests you. It has it’s highs, and when they’re high they’re very, very high, and it has it’s lows most of which are to do with the shocking state of the nation’s crumbling infrastructure (including the education system) or it’s nightmare bureaucracy, which feels like the worst elements of 19th Century Dutch colonial administration overlaid with half a century of incompetence and corruption, until nobody really knows what’s going on much of the time.

Or the shitty, the customer is always wrong service.

Mostly though Indonesia is pretty easy going and muddles along. Java in particular always feels open and very generous (probably more so than Bali, where the smiles you see everywhere can sometimes hide something thoughts rather less charitable).

And so it was yesterday, when we went to the ISP to find out why we get cut off month in, month out regardless of whether we’ve paid or not. And we, at my insistence went to see the owner. And he re-defined the shitty, the customer is always wrong philosophy.

So, Pak Herry, why do we, regardless of whether we pay for your grossly overpriced and slow internet service, get cut off every month.

Because the money has not gone into our account.

But it happens when I pay cash in your office. In fact for the 36 odd months I’ve been with you, it’s happened 20 times and I’ve never been late paying..not once.

It is because of your bank.

It has nothing to do with our bank. It also happens when I pay cash..please listen carefully.

No it doesn’t.

Yes it does.

So you are saying I’m lying?

Mr Simon we are just trying to serve you the best we can.

No you are not, you are now calling your long term reliable paying customer a liar and no number of smarmy platitudes will change that.

You must open an account in our bank.

Pardon?

You must open an account with our bank because our bank has problems with other banks.

Pardon?

You must open an account with our bank because our bank has problems with other banks.

Why can’t you open an account at my bank since it’s yours that is causing the problem.

Mr Simon we are just trying to serve you the best we can. Please help us.

Good god. Brigid gets upset and tells Pak Herry that he’s essentially a smarmy wanker. We move on….

Since you advertise 24hr service, is it possible to have someone in your office after 6pm and before 8am? That is, since your feed often goes down overnight…

Mr Simon we are just trying to serve you the best we can. But no.

Why?

It costs too much. You must wait until morning.

So the biggest independent ISP in Bali can’t afford one person to sit in the office overnight? I don’t believe you.

Mr Simon we are just trying to serve you the best we can. But no.

Why can’t my two connections, at work and home, be on the same invoice?

Mr Simon, we cannot do that.

Why?

It would confuse my staff. Please help us.

Surely it is a simple matter.

Mr Simon we are just trying to serve you the best we can. But no.

So I cannot get one invoice, because I’m worried that we will, now that I will have two connections, regardless of whether they are up to date, be randomly cut off every month.

Mr Simon, I cannot promise you that you won’t but my staff are working very hard to serve you as well as we can.

No you’re not. You are a smarmy soulless git, whose approach to business is to spend as little as possible and see how much you can get away with.

Perhaps you can open an account at our bank?

New ISPs are launching this year. But I’m thoroughly satisfied with ours, after all they are just trying to serve me the best they can.

Petraeus on Gitmo:

Army Gen. David Petraeus said the U.S. military is “beat around the head and shoulders” with images of detainees held in Guantanamo, the facility in Cuba President Barack Obama has vowed to close. He said closing Guantanamo and ensuring detainees are dealt with by an appropriate judicial system would bolster the nation’s war effort in Afghanistan and Iraq.

“I do believe very strongly that we should live our values,” he said. “Generations of soldiers have fought to defend those values, and we should not shrink from living them, from operationalizing them, on the battlefield.”

[From Hot Air Headlines » Petraeus: Yes, it’s time to close Gitmo]

Heard a song on local radio today with a chorus that went:

Kill All White Men, Kill all White Men

It was repeated over and over again and I wondered how a tune called Kill All Black Men or Kill All Brown Men would go down on radio stations elsewhere.

This guy, in his powder bluel nazi helmet, as you do, and his speedos made me lighten up again.

Twit.

Frank Zappa in The Monkees. I love The Monkees. This is ‘king wonderful

New signs on the by-pass road between Sanur and Kuta

We may laugh but this is actually quite a step up. Until last week all roadworks in Bali consisted of large numbers of minimum wage Javanese workers with a rudimentary hand-painted sign, although sometimes none, often working at night with no safety gear or warning lights. As of this week they have flashing lights, orange jackets, road cones, and helmets. I wonder who paid for it..Japan? Australia?

Still swinging their picks and shovels in jandals though….

In the spirit of all things High Street, Auckland, and Cause Celebre (including this post on Public Address from myself), I made a point of tracking down a copy of the very rare, and rather wonderful (and, to the point, fairly important in the scheme of all things musically AK in the 1990s) Freebass album, RAW: Live at Cause Celebre.

Freebass were important for a number of reasons, but not least because it was one of the early vehicles for the Haines brothers, Joel and Nathan. Nathan’s next band was The Enforcers, who went on to record the globally released Shift Left ..the only NZ recorded album ever to appear on Verve.

I remember the night fairly well. Chris Sinclair had miked up the room and he and Mark Tierney taped it struggling against all sorts of adversity. They had to battle with odd acoustics, inebriated folks repeatedly tripping over cables and staff who really didn’t care who or what they were, they had to get that case of Mac’s Gold to the back bar without delay.

But it worked out pretty well, it was a landmark album at the time and, as I recall, sold pretty well. Released on Mark Tierney and Kane Massey’s quite crucial Deepgrooves label, it’s long been unavailable and quite sought after. My (signed) copy had walked somewhere in the past 19 years so I was forced to buy a new copy this week. I sourced it on EBay, from Sydney, and, with the blessing of a couple of the musicians who may or may not own the rights (who the hell knows), I thought I’d post a track.

I’ve always thought that Thinking Of Riccardo may be about the Chilean guy of the name who was around the scene. He was, as I recall, busted for coke importation around this time and we were all rather taken aback. I’ve been meaning to ask for 19 years.

Freebass – Thinking Of Riccardo (DeepGrooves, 1990)

Ho, ho, those jolly open-minded wags at the NU are at it again…

NU spokesman Abdul Muid Shohib said communication using mobile phones was prone to adultery, especially between the sexes.

“Communicating through mobile phones could lead to extramarital affairs,” Abdul told The Jakarta Post through his mobile.

The only communication allowed between different sexes is that which spreads Islamic teachings, he said.

[From After Facebook, NU targets mobile phone calls between sexes | The Jakarta Post]